Raising Self Esteem in Midlife
(Coaching Strategies for Avoiding the Crisis)
|For some of us in the 35-45 year old
category, we may have started to question everything from
our purpose to what we really want to do. Based on some
research I have done, let's explore the so called midlife
What is midlife crisis?
|First, the view of a midlife shift is up
to the perspective of the viewer. The common belief is
that somewhere between the ages of 35-45, people start to
gain an awareness, perhaps for the first time, of their
remaining time. A person's finite time becomes clearer.
This could come as a result of a death in the family, forced unemployment or any number of unanticipated events.
Suddenly, a person is confronted with aging .
Many of us are ill-prepared for how to deal with midlife. All at once, time seems to move much too fast.
Careers, family, marriages and individual growth all compete for top gun.
We all deal with these new challenges much differently. At midlife, children leave home in many cases, for some there are multiple marriages, and widowhood for others.
Society's view of old age doesn't help spur much support for midlife.
At mid-life, depression, suicide, poverty, smoking and alcoholism rates all rise.
Worries increase around everything from jobs becoming dull, to lack of energy.
For men and women, social pressures climax. Many have had some reasonable career success in their eyes, some education and made some money. Added to this, continuing pressures with the balancing act between family and work, aging parents and a renewal of work and branching out for the spouse and you have a challenging time indeed. This leads many to divorce their spouses, have affairs, fall into depression, experience declining levels of energy and an overall feeling of not knowing what to do.
Very few openly confront the issues of midlife. Why? Fear of change, fear of what one might discover about themselves. The most exciting yet threatening journey can be the journey within one's self.
For some, mid-life is a time to let go of past emotional events and move forward. Our attitudes and perspectives change. In midlife, we start to question ourselves.
We become anxious and worry about the rapid change around us. We worry about our self image, past mistakes and our retirement just to name a few.
It becomes harder in midlife to take risks, yet we start to question our life's scripts and ask, is this current role satisfying?
We question our daily habits, our achievements and the daily events we carry out each day. In midlife, individuals start to deal with personal dilemmas that were postponed during many years of a career build up.
For many, midlife is a time for preoccupation. Insight and self-scrutiny brings out fears of death, aging and chronic anxiety. Yet many midlife adults find new methods to release endorphins and discover how to start to live in the present. Midlife adults suddenly find creativity, they never knew existed before, as they think of new choices in their lives.
The good news is, midlife starts the longest period of our lives.
We can take that restless vitality and utilize it. For many, it can be a time to not use this energy to pull away from the pack, but to reach internal goals for one's self.
Midlife adults can start to learn new methods not necessarily to change their life, but the way they experience their lives. This can lead to new choices for making midlife a process for self improvement and not a journey to the unknown.
Midlife can be a choice for renewal or stagnation.
Choices for growth without the crisis.
Utilizing internal strategies for growth will help ourselves and all those around us. As more organizations define personal growth as the responsibility of the employee (All of us), it becomes an increased focus as we enter midlife.
I have done some research on the most common
challenges that many people encounter in midlife. I have
suggested some internal strategies to deal with these.
internal strategies for making midlife a wake up call
|Skip the crisis and take your wake up
(This article is from the workbook Believe in Yourself, A practical Guide in leading yourself and others available from the author)
Copyright © 1997, Craig Nathanson. All Rights Reserved.
Return to home page
Send your feedback to Craig Nathanson
Copyright © 1997,